“To: Husbands, For: Wives; 10 Tips For A Merry Christmas” by Pastor Jim Ricci

“To: Husbands, For: Wives; 10 Tips For A Merry Christmas” by Pastor Jim Ricci

Over the years, I have encountered countless reasons that hinder men from taking the responsibility God has ordained for them as husbands—to lead in their homes.  It is essential to understand that, whatever the reason, there are no valid excuses that God would ever accept for a husband not being the leader of his family.  If you are a father, it’s important to remember that if you want to show true love to your children, you must truly love their mother.

Here are 10 things every husband can do for his wife to nurture love and leadership in his home this Christmas—and all year!

  • Make talk time a daily habit.  Don’t allow yourself to become so busy that you can’t spend 15 minutes a day talking with your wife.
  • Act interested in what your wife has to say.  Sometimes we can feel as though the things our spouses talk about can be boring, long-winded, dramatic, or illogical.  Hopefully this is not always the case—but even if it is, show your wife that you care about her by actively listening to what she has to say.
  • Hug and kiss her throughout the day.  Remember the affectionate way you might have held her hand, put your arms around her waist, and kissed her softly while you were engaged?
  • Write her a love note.  It doesn’t have to be pure poetry to make her heart flutter.  Simply write down the things you appreciate about her.
  • Take her on a coffee date.  Let her know you want to hear all the details of her day over a nice, hot cup of coffee.
  • Compliment her.  If you think she’s beautiful, for example, tell her.
  • Help her out with some of her daily responsibilities and look for ways to serve her.  Whether it’s picking up some extra chores around the house, running errands, helping out more with the kids or pets, or whatever else you can do to lighten her load and make her life easier, just do it.
  • Notice what she worries about and reassure her.  Strengthen yourself first in the Lord, then encourage your wife.  Reassure her often that everything is going to be okay.
  • Bring her an unexpected gift.  Many people enjoy receiving gifts, and it doesn’t really matter whether they come in small or big packages.  Maybe she’s compiling a wish list of things she wants.  Take a peek and surprise her.
  • Open up to her about yourself.  Your wife wants to hear about your life.  She wants to know what is making you happy and what is stressing you out.

Through Christ, give your wife and family the greatest gift of all: Give the gift of living better, kinder, more honest, more faithful, more hopeful, more positive, more thoughtful, more committed to your family, and with more courage, more compassion, and more love as you finish this year and begin a new one.

Merry Christmas, Pastor Jim Ricci


(Jim Ricci was the Associative Pastor and Care and Counseling Pastor at Cranston Christian Fellowship in Rhode Island from 1989 to 2017. He is now the Executive Director at Aletheia Counseling Ministries in Warwick, RI.)